36 weeks

final countdown: 4 weeks until my guess date. 28 days. six hundred seventy two hours. do i sound anxious? that's because i am. not that i'm not enjoying walking around in 90 degree weather with an extra 30 lbs of weight, it's just that being this close to the end and waiting is hard. patience has never been one of my strongest attributes and with every ache and pain or sleepless night the small amount i do have is dwindling. we're ready to meet this little one already!

i'm quite certain that almost as quickly as i've adjusted from being pregnant to having our baby girl here i will begin to miss certain things about these last 9 months but there are a few things that i am also sure i will not miss. here, in no particular order, are 10 things i won't miss about being pregnant:

1. the absence of coffee in my life. i know some doctors say a cup a day is fine but whenever i try i feel like my heart is jumping out of my chest. i'm already short of breath and caffeine only makes it worse. i know what you're thinking, a simple solution would be decaf. i'm sorry have you tasted decaf coffee? not enjoyable.

2. restricted sleeping positions. i am a stomach sleeper and sadly as you can imagine this is no longer possible for me. before you ask, yes i have a body pillow (thank you rita) and while this can be helpful as i try to find a comfortable position (operative word being try) it does not satisfy my need to be on my belly.

3. the intense concentration that's required to get out of bed. with my uterus the size of a prize pumpkin one false move and i may end up flat on my back, turtle-style. this means that i have taken to crawling backwards out of bed on all fours. (which by the way i do 4-5 times per night, see #4.)

4. having to pee every 5 minutes.

5. the general freedom people feel to comment on my body. for example: "you're huge!" or my personal favorite "you're not even that fat yet." let me just say that no matter what your native language it is never ok to refer to a woman as huge or to talk about whether she is or isn't fat.

6. feeling like i've run a marathon after walking up a flight of stairs or the panting that sets in as i walk home carrying groceries.

7. diet restrictions. i want sushi and beer and wine and bourbon and unpasteurized cheese damn it. (ok i've had some wine)

8. wearing the same thing everyday. i have a whole wardrobe of cute skirts and dresses and i cannot wait to be able to wear them again. did i mention how much i miss anything high waisted? while there's nothing quite as wonderful as having an excuse to wear elastic banded clothing, allowing for as much ice cream eating as i might like, i'm ready to have options again. plus, elastic bands are not very helpful in accountability.

9. not being able to do things because i am pregnant. i miss riding a bike, i miss running, i miss drinking beer and bourbon (wait i already said that), i miss thinking about something other than being pregnant, and i really miss riding a bike!

10. uncontrollable belching. i'm looking forward to being able to eat a meal without being reminded of it for the next 2 hours. i think if we're being honest stijn won't miss this one either as it may mean the return of seeing his wife in a romantic light.

obviously none of these are serious problems and compared with some of the possible complications of pregnancy like preeclampsia or mandatory bedrest i've had it pretty easy. in truth these last 9 months have been some of the best of my life and soon (yes please come soon) we get to meet the little one whose little kicks and uppercuts to my ribs i have come to love so much.

and soon in case you forgot would be within the next 4 weeks. that's 28 days or six hundred seventy two hours.